Bitch of the Week: Jennifer Lawrence

Holla at a bitch.

The reigning Bitch of the Week is long overdue for the title. Jennifer Lawrence has been on the short list for quite a while, and I'm elated to finally get on this shit. With the Academy Awards just around the corner, the timing couldn't be better!

Born and raised in Kentucky, bitch started her acting career on The Bill Engvall Show. Roots like these aren't typically those which produce Bitches of the Week, but luckily Jennifer only spent three years on that shit before eventually getting her breakout role in 2010's Winter's Bone. In the film, Jennifer played a bitchin' hick who goes through a lot of shit in the backwoods meth ring to find out what happened to her father. She even eats a squirrel.

Of course, it wasn't until The Hunger Games that Jenny and her bow and arrow landed on most people's radars. And now with a million awards for her performance in Silver Linings Playbook, it seems like Jennifer is unstoppable. That's all good and dandy, but what really makes Jennifer a true bitch is her personality. She gives absolutely no fucks when it comes to life, and that's exactly how it should be.

Rather than tell you myself, I'll let JLaw do the talking:

• On exercising: "I hate saying 'I like exercising.' I want to punch people who say that in the face."
• On a bowl of fan questions: "I thought it was gonna be food. It's just... words."
• On meeting Catching Fire director Francis Lawrence: "Our first conversation was on the phone. I was in the bathtub, and I had to tell him that I was in the bathtub because I was afraid he would think I was, like, playing in the toilet when he heard water swishing around. [...] Then we had breakfast in Santa Monica, and I spit egg inside of his mouth when I was talking. Like, it went in. Into his mouth."
• On describing herself: "Very well-rounded, and practically perfect."
• On peeing: "I’m the fastest pee-er ever. I’m famous for it."

I understand this was an incredibly brief history of Jenny's bitchery, but I truly believe some things require no explanation. Right now, everybody has their eyes on this girl and we can all easily see why she's Bitch of the Week. If you're still not convinced, watch ANY of her interviews from late night television. It's life changing, seriously.