Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Kelly Clarkson: Queen of Flops and Also Covers

Even she knows she's a flop!

Kelly Clarkson, to put it quite simply, puzzles me. Sometimes she's a star, sometimes she's a flop. Sometimes she's thin, sometimes she's, well, not. Sometimes I care, but most of the time I don't. I just don't get it. I'm not sure what her game plan in life is, but if she thinks she can just coast on the "prestige" of being the first American Idol, she better think again, because she may be the first American Idol, but Carrie Underwood will always be the best. As for the other winners, do you know their names? Do you even know how many there are? I digress slash rest my case.

Anyway, just when I think we're finally done with Kelly and that she's given up on her career, she comes flying out of the woodwork like a bat out of hell with catchy tunes such as "Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)" and then she thinks she's hot shit again, taking the whole country by storm and performing in semi-full, mostly outdoor venues. Oh, how the mighty have fallen. How she swallows her pride, musters up the courage to perform under such circumstances, and resists the humiliation of it all is beyond me! Of course, this all happens when she's not busy judging the smash hit singing competition Duets on ABC. (Haven't heard of it? Yeah, I haven't really either.)

I'm convinced that her career resurrection is only temporary, but not even I can deny that which launched Kelly into stardom in the first place: her voice. While her voice is usually wasted on her own songs, like the clumsy country wannabe shitfest "Mr. Know It All" as well as early hits like "Miss Independent" and "Walk Away" that have been exhausted to fucking death, Kelly also loans her golden pipes to other songs. You know, good songs. At every show of her Weaker Stronger Tour, bitch belts out a fan-requested cover like nobody's business. Below are some of my faves. If you've given up on Kelly like I had, perhaps these will help you flip a U-ie and holla back into her fandom.

"Everytime" by Britney Spears

"Someone Like You" by Adele

"Fix You" by Coldplay

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